Sybil Danning, Donald Pleasence, Rick Hill, Josephine Jacqueline Jones, Tally Chanel, Samantha Fox, Suzanna Smith, David Brandon, Mario Cruciani, Marco Tullio Cau.
Spectacular fights! Exciting Adventure! Electrifying drama! Erotic fantasies! Adrenaline-soaked excitement! Incredible effects and epic pictures! And nothing is mentioned of it in the movies called WARRIOR QUEEN, which is most serious effort to let each tax return as an attractive leisure activity.
It can be said not imagine that you would not have warned of Briefing: Chuck Vincent, turned the former porn and later the video stores with amateurish nonsense like JAIL ACADEMY and THE SISTERS OF THE SEED BANK filled led, directed, produced, Harry Alan Towers, the Billigststreifen as GOR and
THE SEVEN MEN OF Sumuru served, is also listed as a producer Massaccesi Aristide, who under the pseudonym "Joe D'Amato" Out of such
PORNO HOLOCAUST , oh yes, has the responsibility. But of course all of these people have sometimes turned also seriously entertaining trash cinema, and also does so with Donald Pleasence, how bad the film can thus be already? Oh, oh, you can not guess.
We start with a green field and a text: Pompeii, 22 August 79 AD. As I raised two questions. First, I picture the only one, or Pompeii was not a green lawn, but a city? And second, the date has to mean something? in 79 something happened to Pompeii? Felix qui potuit rerum causas cognoscere, you can say, because now we know that at some point something very bad is going to happen, what may have to do with the mountain, shown constantly. But still we do not care about that: A caravan moves around and is suddenly attacked by a gang of hooligans. Fortunately, Berenice part of this caravan, and they will not only played by Sybil Danning, but even the eponymous protagonist. Zack-zack, already has the sinister bully Berenice done with the sword. Tiht-Tüht-Tuht-fidel-li-ision of power to the synthesizer. At this time we know as a viewer by the way is not that the scene not for the film is relevant, nor that it probably only serves to sell the film at all than WARRIOR QUEEN, since you are Berenice namely in the rest of the movie almost impossible to fight.
Instead, we see now in Pompeii (the fairness, we note that the slaves to be associated with the caravan to the city: Not that we now accuses someone, we would hide the dramatic arc ausgeklügten) a slave auction. It works like this: the slave to be sold (or slave) is pulled by chains in the air and then hangs down naked, while the four present bit player to shout how much money they would be worth the slave. One can consider at this time whether the film follows a more European art-house approach and will denounce with tedious lengthy settings meat inspection in ancient Pompeii, or whether the scene mainly serves the participating women are beautiful, near naked swinging around with the camera . let A little later we learn the ruler of Pompeii know, and Donald Pleasence plays him with an almost unbelievable enthusiasm. The ruler will impress Berenice and can therefore play first times two muscular slave arm wrestling, the loser's hand injured by a poisoned arrow and die. Then allowed the ruler pigeons flying through the hall and tried with jubilant laughter, they capture with a net. One can not really blame Pleasence that he was not with enthusiasm in the matter. Sybil Danning is sitting next to it and yawns, and you can feel with her.
It follows a long orgy sequence. Since then, a man strolling with an eye patch (the brothel owner, who bought most of the slaves) give a large room, where in every nook and cranny men and women sensual pleasures. A short stature is also in the room, and is used by the man with the eye patch hastily slapped. Incidentally is wobbled in the room and gasped, and while the minutes long so look, one starts to ponder whether or not vacuum would be a real rock affair again. A major slave / slave foreman / Puffprinzessin then takes a blonde slave girl to her room, and she pulls his hand comic circles through the air, while the blonde lying naked on the table. The synthesizer make in its mainly "uuuh" and "ooh", with lots of echo and reverb, and while the two lesbians who obviously have no idea what (could or do) make lesbians in the bedroom at all, since holes in the air scrabbling around and watch his arms, then pull one sees the precious minutes of his life and wishes for the relatively smooth breathless excitement of a film like
HEART BEAT back.
And, sigh, we're not done with the transmitter circuit eroticism. The main slave leads namely then a snake dance, which would in a few years of practice certainly be nice, and we see different, um, erotic, uh, situations, the orgy: men, women, front, rear, top, bottom , and for many many minutes can always with the same parts and a hypnotic drumming to psychedelia-Gewaber developing Synthbrei. I imagine something like that to stay ahead in a limbo: One has to listen to clips unerotic feverish nightmare soundtrack, and again and again and again and again. Shudder.
But of course the movie has more to offer than just incredibly bland orgies without rhyme or reason: it incredibly dull gladiator fights follow no rhyme or reason. Now, as two boys fight against each other with a sort of Frisbee, except that the Frisbee is as razor sharp and should not be taken away. Each Gladiator is tied with a rope to a pole after each round and must march again to the pole to the line and thus shorten the alternative. Whoosh, whoosh, the plate is flying back and forth a few times, and incidentally raises the great gladiator who looks like Lou Ferrigno, the thing a spectator in the head because of the unsportsmanlike things have roared down from above. But this is obviously not a criterion for disqualification, and therefore wins Gladiator Lou even after he has thrown his opponent's disc into the stomach and intestines flutschen the colorful from the body such as pasta in a pot. Here are a few other obscure games that probably only have so little to do with the plot, because there is not even such. One must admire riders and lions and hundreds of extras - all from the movie THE LAST DAYS OF POMPEII, which was again recovered, with dozens of settings. (Who does not archive recordings can distinguish the film, uses the following rule of thumb. Many people, big buildings, exciting spectacle = not our film in our film is the arena of a gray wall and a yellow column, which suspiciously like the column from the orgy room looks like.)
So the fun is so for quite a long time away, and eventually some of the main characters actually fight in the forest, and then throw themselves back to half-naked muscular men in homoerotic moments, serious moments. Tieht-Tüht Fiep-making to the soundtrack, and occasionally we again see the volcano, which we know very well that he must break out at some point. Fifteen minutes before the end he does it finally: time for a new second window of the movie THE LAST DAYS OF POMPEII. Building collapse, the earth quakes, hundreds of people running across the street. In between times always pictures that were specially filmed for WARRIOR QUEEN: Three extras run coughing through the dust, the camera shakes, Pappmachésäulen fall to flourish. Hot lava flows across the screen (maybe even close-ups of the tomato sauce from Mama Vincent's cooking pot). Donald Pleasence is run over by a horse-drawn wagons and archive material dragged through the city. The synthesizers do mainly "wuuuh", sometimes called "miiieh.
A little later, trudging through the various actors Green Look out bedröppelt. Berenice can go blonde slave. The sky is blue. Everything will be fine. We have survived WARRIOR QUEEN.
(2010)
